The Countdown. How A Deadline Gets Established..

Suddenly the motivation and energy to go through the novel my agent critiqued recently has descended on me. As it is, I am counting the days (sleeps) until the pin in my toe is removed and I can start to walk with full weight on that foot. It dawns on me that after this date, my life will become busier again. If I don't face the comments about this novel now, will I have time like this later? Not likely. Especially since I am already revising short stories and considering again a manuscript of my memoir. And wondering if I can finish my mystery novel in the next few months.

So I began to reread the novel called Would I Lie To You? again. Yes, I can see areas where it slows down. I can see the ambivalence of Sue, the main character, about the man who attracts her after the death of her husband. Also that she ought to start to think about the child she gave up for adoption, something she ought to have done much sooner. That theme is too important for it to be on the second tier of the story. It is likely the most important life experience for Sue to come to grips with. So I am engrossed in this now, half way through the pages. Shifting sections around. Taking sections and realigning the focus. Not sure what else yet, but it is a changed novel already. And I will likely finish tweaking it, working on it by the end of the weekend. And then I can have the conversation with the agent she suggested when we discussed her reactions just before I went for surgery.

Yes, surgery. The last day of August now and I have spent an entire month on the porch! Not venturing out into the city as I protected my foot and got around on crutches, hoping the surgery and subsequent will allow me to walk and dance again soon. And to get out and listen to readings of writers who interest me. To go to movies at TIFF. With a new appreciation of the health and freedom to do those things.

So writing has been a large part of this time even when simply watching the world go by. With the reflection that occurred in that time suggesting nothing in particular. Except perhaps as the time comes to an end, I think I will continue to appreciate more my family and friends who have been so supportive. And at the same time, have more capacity for the isolation writing demands. For a long time, I've run from it even when I've faced it. I hope that now I can face it on an ongoing basis. And without cutting or damaging my ties with the world beyond that.

Posted on August 31, 2011 .